Amusings

Time and energy are the currency we use to buy the things we want.  Sometimes we find out, after the purchase, that what we bought isn’t what we wanted.  Unfortunately, with the currency we used, there is no return policy and our receipt or proof of purchase is experience.
–Me (Nov 8, 2022)

The above quote came to me as a revelation.  I wouldn’t say that it’s a landmark thought, but the concept seems relevant and applicable to many different situations in life.

This epiphany came to me one day while contemplating my current state of affairs… And while sitting beneath a dark and stormy cloud of life.

I’ve hung onto this quote since then… And thoughts about it have bounced around in my head from time to time… And it’s time to give those thoughts their due respect.

No… You cannot walk into a store and buy something with your time and energy… But time and energy were used to earn the dollars to make that purchase.  And really, when we are shopping for something, we are doing this evaluation in real time in our heads.

Is the product that I’m intending to buy equal to the time and energy that I expended to earn the dollars to make this purchase?

If we come to the conclusion that the intrinsic value of the object to be purchased is worth more than the dollars to accomplish this, we are more inclined to make that purchase.  If that intrinsic value far exceeds the dollar value of the object, we may conclude that we are getting a good deal.  And if we deem that the dollar value exceeds the object’s intrinsic value, we may either bite our lip and make the purchase… Or we may look for alternatives that are more in line with our sense of value.

Stepping away from the purchasing of physical objects, we can look at other areas of our lives and make that same evaluation.  A potential home renovation project… Considering a job or career change… Moving to a new geographic location… Determining the importance of relationships in our lives… The concept is endlessly applicable.

But we, as sentient beings, are not static… We’re dynamic and always changing… Objects and relationships change in their value over time.  What we once held close and considered valuable, may gain or lose intrinsic value as our priorities, personal values, and situations change over time.

It could be construed, if we keep following this line of logic, that many of the discrepancies that we encounter in our relationships can be thought of as a mismatch in values between people.  One person places a higher value on some aspect of the relationship than the other person does.

And… Then comes the tougher part of the equation.  What happens when we make a purchase or relationship commitment… And then start to question our purchase or role in that relationship?  Relationships are dynamic.  Aspects of another person’s personality that we once viewed as a positive attribute… May end up looking like a detriment if our value scale or personal situation changes.  You know that feeling… If you’ve been in a capsizing relationship.  

I’ve put all of my time and effort into this relationship… For so long… That has to be worth something, right?  If I call it quits, all of that time and energy was for nothing.   

I’ve had this internal discussion many times over the years.  Sometimes I deemed the relationship valuable and worth attempting to preserve… And other times, I’ve come to a different conclusion.  

But… I guess I’ve come to look at relationships in a newer light… And with an additional quality… Relationships have the potential to be dangerous and destructive.  When the power dynamic in a relationship is left unchecked… Which can be common when the chaos of day-to-day life takes priority over critical thought… The purchase that you paid for with your blood, sweat, and tears… Can come back and take a large chuck out of your posterior end.

And, I guess that my conclusion to all of this… Is that you really need to be in tune with your personal set of values… That vast repository of ideas and beliefs that we hold dear… And sometimes rarely vocalize… Our authentic selves.  

And realize… That, at any time during the purchase process, we can end the transaction… And choose a new path that lines up with us… Authentically.  And realize, also… That if a relationship ends due to a difference in personal values… We will be left with only our experience.  And, given the high price we paid for that experience… We better learn something from it to get our money’s worth.